I am officially still alive, though I'm currently in that strange state of mental fuzziness that comes with a lack of sleep! It's been a hard 5-7 days, with discovering that I underestimated the work load of my summer placement by quite a lot & didn't get cracking sooner! With that in mind, my 'final' evaluation did not go as well as it should have. The knock-on effect is that I have a lot of work that I need to complete over the next 12 days alongside my day to day teaching/planning/marking.
What came as a humbling reminder in the aftermath of the evaluation (and in prayer, I ought to add) was that God's got me on this course because he wants me to complete it and take up my post as yr 4 teacher next yerar. As such, he knew that I'd underestimate the requirements for this placement and as a result, struggle to complete the work. Equally important is the fact that God has been sustaining and will continue to sustain me through the remainder of my PGCE.
Coupled with these reminders, in my bible meditation I've been working through Romans 6-8 over the past 2-3 months & the stark challenge has been - am I wanting to walk in the Spirit, or walk in the flesh? I was reminded this morning that I need to be spiritually minded, and in order to do that this involves humbly desiring to walk with God. If we're seeking God to be spiritually minded, allowing ourselves to be guided by the Holy Spirit, then we will know life and peace.
It's going to be hard work, but I praise God that he sustains us when we humble ourselves before him and cry out 'I am weak; be my strength!' Don't forget that this is our God, who 'opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.' Prov 3:34. I'm feeling totally shattered, but I can't help but praise God for his strength, his grace, his peace and above all for Jesus' sacrifice on the cross for me. Because, as I keep learning, if my joy is set firmly in thankfulness for my sins having been forgiven, no matter how hard he tries, the enemy can't take it away.
Let's crack on :)
TheWeeScottie
---------------------------------------------------------------
weird is just your own personal brand of normal
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Monday, June 16, 2008
Running on grace
Running on grace
Is it really that time already?
I could have sworn it was half-past eight.
But it's now that I'm fast realising
that I'm once again working quite late.
This teaching malarkey's quite draining,
well, 'quite' is a kind way to say
that my energy's drained by the morning
and I ought to be dead by the day.
But despite work I find I'm still going,
it doesn't make sense in my mind.
As the hours I keep (with my severe lack of sleep)
ought to knock me for six in my mind.
So I break for a mo, grab my coffee,
and think why this strange thing should be,
that in spite of the lack of my physical rest
I'm fuelled with enough energy.
My breakfast is just 'bout enough
to last til the mid-morning breather,
but after that's over, work's white cliffs of Dover
loom high over tea's brief reliever!
As for lunch, there I'm working as well,
with the afternoon work needing prep
so rest gets no look-in when children just book in
for that chat that will raise up their pep.
Dinner is rushed, true to say,
and the evenings have so much in store!
That by time home I'm led, the sun's gone to bed,
and I'm back to eight-thirty once more!
So my question has come around again,
how come I've not burned myself out?
Thus with clinical reason, through this ridiculous season,
I learn what my strength's all about.
It's not been the food that I've eaten
and definately not much from rest,
by all human reason, in this Tim-hunting season,
I should have failed this physical test.
Yet I haven't - may I hazard just why?
So simple, a reason, I know,
but when your engine is paced by the joy from that grace,
your fuel never quite runs too low.
This strength, so I learn's, just enough
to do what's required of me.
So may I continue, to walk, his strength in me,
and in grateful, and thankfulness be.
So now at 12:12 comes day's end,
and off to bed now I will lead.
My sleep may seem short, and less than it ought
but in his hands it's just what I need.
Tim Caird - 17/06/08 (12:12am)
TheWeeScottie
---------------------------------------------------------------
weird is just your own personal brand of normal
Is it really that time already?
I could have sworn it was half-past eight.
But it's now that I'm fast realising
that I'm once again working quite late.
This teaching malarkey's quite draining,
well, 'quite' is a kind way to say
that my energy's drained by the morning
and I ought to be dead by the day.
But despite work I find I'm still going,
it doesn't make sense in my mind.
As the hours I keep (with my severe lack of sleep)
ought to knock me for six in my mind.
So I break for a mo, grab my coffee,
and think why this strange thing should be,
that in spite of the lack of my physical rest
I'm fuelled with enough energy.
My breakfast is just 'bout enough
to last til the mid-morning breather,
but after that's over, work's white cliffs of Dover
loom high over tea's brief reliever!
As for lunch, there I'm working as well,
with the afternoon work needing prep
so rest gets no look-in when children just book in
for that chat that will raise up their pep.
Dinner is rushed, true to say,
and the evenings have so much in store!
That by time home I'm led, the sun's gone to bed,
and I'm back to eight-thirty once more!
So my question has come around again,
how come I've not burned myself out?
Thus with clinical reason, through this ridiculous season,
I learn what my strength's all about.
It's not been the food that I've eaten
and definately not much from rest,
by all human reason, in this Tim-hunting season,
I should have failed this physical test.
Yet I haven't - may I hazard just why?
So simple, a reason, I know,
but when your engine is paced by the joy from that grace,
your fuel never quite runs too low.
This strength, so I learn's, just enough
to do what's required of me.
So may I continue, to walk, his strength in me,
and in grateful, and thankfulness be.
So now at 12:12 comes day's end,
and off to bed now I will lead.
My sleep may seem short, and less than it ought
but in his hands it's just what I need.
Tim Caird - 17/06/08 (12:12am)
TheWeeScottie
---------------------------------------------------------------
weird is just your own personal brand of normal
Sunday, June 08, 2008
Grace
Grace
'Grace that knocks me 'tween the eyes
reminds me that I'm not despised
Grace that took my sordid stain
and made this sinner whole again
Grace that satisfies my debt,
and keeps the vow I have not kept
Grace that pays the price so high
that in the grave I'll never lie
Grace that's seen this sinner saved
to renewed mind, from thoughts depraved.
Grace that knocks my mind for six
for in this heart, sin and mercy mix
and overcome by mercy's grace
my knee must bow before His face
Grace so undeserved is mine,
may he continue to refine.'
Tim Caird, 8th May 2008
TheWeeScottie
---------------------------------------------------------------
weird is just your own personal brand of normal
'Grace that knocks me 'tween the eyes
reminds me that I'm not despised
Grace that took my sordid stain
and made this sinner whole again
Grace that satisfies my debt,
and keeps the vow I have not kept
Grace that pays the price so high
that in the grave I'll never lie
Grace that's seen this sinner saved
to renewed mind, from thoughts depraved.
Grace that knocks my mind for six
for in this heart, sin and mercy mix
and overcome by mercy's grace
my knee must bow before His face
Grace so undeserved is mine,
may he continue to refine.'
Tim Caird, 8th May 2008
TheWeeScottie
---------------------------------------------------------------
weird is just your own personal brand of normal
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