Would you enjoy me?

I asked him once
what should I do?
He waited just one moment to reply.
"Would you enjoy me?"
"Why?" said I.
"There must be more that I could do?"
"More than my son achieved for you?"
"Well, what about the people who
have yet to know you, like I do?"
"But would they know me,
through knowing you,
if you didn't first enjoy me too?"
I stopped and pondered just a while
enough to think on what he'd said.
Could my heart be burning,
yet be dead?
Burnt out on all the things I'd said
that I would say and do?
"But what about the time I spend
reading all that I can each day,
giving myself in both work and play
to find out more in books and word?"
"Do they warm your heart to me?
Do they make your spirit sing
as the Spirit longs your soul to sing
with words that he would give to you?"
I stopped again and thought.
Though reading much, had I simply bought
self-satisfaction that I was
doing all I felt I ought to?"
"And if my heart was cold through all?"
"Then ask me to reveal myself instead.
And in play and work, in trial and ease,
don't feel like you have to appease
me, son.
He walked the life you're trying hard
to live.
He lived it so you'd not have to.
No longer to tightrope walk the sense
that what you're doing's not enough,
it's done.
Would you accept his life is enough for you?"
Speechless I saw his love,
clear as crystal light,
His son's life enough for me
and the helper who reminded me each day.
"It is enough," I smiled at him.
"Now enjoy me, son." His voice replied.

TheWeeScottie

Under changing skies

Under changing skies

Under changing skies I wait

and wonder while I wander.

Preferring to walk and think

rather than sit and wait,

let the world pass by,

friendships come and go,

I score a path behind me

human snail in the trails I leave

upon the hearts and lives

of people new and old.

Hoping trails leave a helpful

imprint in the minds of those

who stumble across them

and whose lives have been left changed.

What will they remember

when I'm gone?

The ever-changing sky of life,

a character reduced to simple words

faint memories etched in time,

or something greater, more profound

which sears the soul

and leaves burning tracks

through mental pathways

seemingly dead?

Under changing skies I wait

to see your face,

and feel my soul on fire.

TheWeeScottie

Meet you there

You feel so far tonight

sat their in your snug cocoon

but I can't speak to you

far beyond the sun and moon

moonbeams flood your face

as you race on

through time and space

you'll reach those gates quite soon

so go on before me,

I'll meet you there.

Run in meadows sweet

use those legs

you're now complete

You missed him for so long

now arms will hold you

firm and strong

though I can hold you close

you mind has wandered

far away

one day I'll hold you close

I'll meet you there.

Final beat, you've gone

left behind

that broken shell

Now wake and see his face

how I wish that I

could hold his gaze

so let yourself be free

to run those fields

you loved so much

not long to go now,

I'll meet you there.

TheWeeScottie

Just an apple?

While eating an apple this afternoon, I had a thought. Did Adam blame the apple for what happened in the garden of Eden? The bible's pretty clear that the eating of the apple was the turning point for him and Eve and started the chain of the events that saw them having to leave the garden. To leave God's presence as he'd made them to enjoy it.

Was it the apple's fault? It's pretty easy to blame the things near to us for things that happen - They made me angry! That image just came into my head! I just got distracted! I can hear myself saying all three of these things and a hundred more. But are these things to blame? Do they have power over me to bend my will?

They don't. It was my choice. My heart wanted to. I chose it. It always does. What was the same for Adam in the garden is the same for me today. I wanted it. It was my decision. The situations I am in each day - those which notably challenge me, and those I don't realise do - serve to show me my heart. I am innately selfish - it goes down to the bone. Part of me feels I need or should have these things which erode me. But there again is that smack of selfishness. Someone once said there is no 'I' in team, though another points out there is a 'me', though you wouldn't notice it on first glance. This is the way of things that tempt us, push us, challenge us, threaten. Things the enemy loves to use. The chinks in our armour.

We need to recognise the chinks in our armour. And harder than this, because our selfish hearts hate to do this, is to ask, to plead with God to show them to us. Romans 8v37 says we can't be separated from God's love. However my heart can choose to ignore it. And it often does.

So is it just an apple? No. It's a signpost to the state of my heart. It's a reminder that I am a sinner (rebel) and will continue to sin (rebel) until the day I die. But that Jesus says there is a better way. Knowing him is just so much better than the 'apples' I come across in my life. The true fruit of the garden was knowing and walking with God. Do I really want it? Yes. And I am amazingly thankful that God not only can help me change my mind and heart on that one, he also wants to. All I need to is turn to Him, and ask.

TheWeeScottie

A sandbox life

Over the past 3 months I've enjoyed playing a PC/Mac game called Terraria. This is a sandbox game which means it is made more for exploring and being creative rather than having a player completing traditional 'levels'. I've enjoyed exploring without the pressure of a structure in things, being able to make buildings and creations out of the blocks of the world but in reflection I've seen that as the game has no specific goals - like the end of a level or beating a boss and progressing in the game - that it's easy to spend a lot of time just playing it. With no fixed end-points, game-imposed goals or targets I find it hard to play for set times without the aid of our egg timer. In short, I need goals. I need something to aim towards.

In further reflection I wonder if this is true for our lives as a whole. Can we live contentedly with purpose if we have no end-game goal, no target to work towards? For example, I know I work better when there's a deadline on coming up, or even if a job needs to be done by the end of the day. But are these goals and targets placed in my life by work or society's view of life sufficient? What if you woke up and those waypoints in your life are gone? What then?

I think we're made for purpose - we need something solid to live for, something certain - and for me, that's Jesus, the relationship he wants to have with me, and the promise of a future with him when he comes again. Sometimes I think we set our sights too low in our targets. Are we too easily content in the familiar things in our lives?

In playing Terraria I've been reminded it's easy to live a sandbox life - content to live in my me-bubble of contentedness - and miss the potential of life outside it. The risk of real life, the love and the hurt of real life, the reward of real life. For me that real life is a life where I know Jesus. What is it to you?

TheWeeScottie