I am officially still alive, though I'm currently in that strange state of mental fuzziness that comes with a lack of sleep! It's been a hard 5-7 days, with discovering that I underestimated the work load of my summer placement by quite a lot & didn't get cracking sooner! With that in mind, my 'final' evaluation did not go as well as it should have. The knock-on effect is that I have a lot of work that I need to complete over the next 12 days alongside my day to day teaching/planning/marking.
What came as a humbling reminder in the aftermath of the evaluation (and in prayer, I ought to add) was that God's got me on this course because he wants me to complete it and take up my post as yr 4 teacher next yerar. As such, he knew that I'd underestimate the requirements for this placement and as a result, struggle to complete the work. Equally important is the fact that God has been sustaining and will continue to sustain me through the remainder of my PGCE.
Coupled with these reminders, in my bible meditation I've been working through Romans 6-8 over the past 2-3 months & the stark challenge has been - am I wanting to walk in the Spirit, or walk in the flesh? I was reminded this morning that I need to be spiritually minded, and in order to do that this involves humbly desiring to walk with God. If we're seeking God to be spiritually minded, allowing ourselves to be guided by the Holy Spirit, then we will know life and peace.
It's going to be hard work, but I praise God that he sustains us when we humble ourselves before him and cry out 'I am weak; be my strength!' Don't forget that this is our God, who 'opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.' Prov 3:34. I'm feeling totally shattered, but I can't help but praise God for his strength, his grace, his peace and above all for Jesus' sacrifice on the cross for me. Because, as I keep learning, if my joy is set firmly in thankfulness for my sins having been forgiven, no matter how hard he tries, the enemy can't take it away.
Let's crack on :)
weird is just your own personal brand of normal